Note To Self

James stood there gazing at Melissa’s hair reflecting in the sun light. Like liquid gold it was.

He knew her since they were five years old. They played together in primary school, they supported each other in secondary school. Friends for over 11 years until they both finished school. It was then time for the both to choose colleges and universities.

She moved away, went to university to study forensic science. He stayed behind, studied at his local college. He found it difficult not talking to her every day. The two tried to stay in touch but over the years like all things they grew apart.

It only took two years for the two not to even speak to one another anymore. People lose contact all the time, but he always thought she was his soul mate. The two were meant to be together and because of that he knew that they would meet again.

She dropped out of university only after a year and ended up getting a dead end job. But it didn’t matter because she met a guy with an awesome job. The two became an item and eventually moved in together. She never felt like the love was there but it was convenient. He was a nice guy and he treated her well. I suppose that’s all that should matter in this day and age. There doesn’t seem to be enough time for love.

James on the other hand, he had his fair share of women problems, never being able to keep in a relationship for more than a few months. Definitely for not more than a year. He changed his women more times than he changed his job. His last break up was a hard one, especially because she had just left him for his best friend. It felt like he couldn’t catch a break.

Fast forward a few years to the current year. Melissa’s fiancé had just received a new job but it meant that the two would have to move back to her home town. She didn’t mind though, her family lived there. She hadn’t seen her own family in so long.

And so the two packed up and went back home. Things were great for awhile until she grew bored at home alone while the other half was always at work earning a living. She decided she should get a job. Going for a random interview at a random place she managed to get the job with no problem at all, her charisma always gets her the job.

The first day of work came on the Monday, she was excited but nervous at the same time. It was fun meeting new people but always worried what they might think of her.

She walked into her new job with a smile on her face and a spring in her step. She was instructed to wait in the canteen for the supervisor to come and show her what she was doing. She was informed that the other new starters were in there too so she should go and mingle.

She walked in the canteen, the first face she saw… James; looking depressed at the notion of being stuck in yet another dead end job. She smiled and walked over to him. Sitting down opposite, James moved his eyes from the table to whoever it was that just sat down opposite. He had never been so surprised in all his life. There she was; after over a decade of being apart.

He knew she was his soul mate, he had started to lose faith.

Over the weeks the two restarted their friendship like they had never been apart. Being together reminded them of happier, simpler times. They started hanging out with each other after work, going to bars, talking about old times.

James quickly fell in love with her all over again, she was his soul mate after all.

The amount of time they spent together caused many arguments at home for Melissa as her fiancé grew increasingly jealous. Everytime they argued it drove her into James’ arms. The final time, she couldn’t help it. James was always there for her when she needed him the most.

She grabbed his face and pulled it to hers, they kissed passionately. James couldn’t believe it, it was like all of his dreams had come true at once.

The two started spending more and more time together after that. She grew apart from her fiancé, she had felt for James something that she had never felt for him.

James sat there in his apartment reading the newspaper. “Man hangs self in office” on the front page. A knock at his door.

It was Melissa standing there in the rain, holding a suitcase. James embraced her with open arms and walked her inside. Telling her that she can stay as long as she wants. The two kissed again as Melissa removed James’ t-shirt, feeling his dry, warm body.

She then took off her coat, followed by her top revealing her supple breasts. James’ smile grew. The two kiss again, more passionately than before as the two continue to undress.

This was the moment James had been waiting for, the one moment he thought would never happen was about to, he took off his jeans as Melissa dropped her skirt.

James removes his underwear and Melissa smiles. She then removes her underwear and stood there proud.

James on the other hand shrieked with horror. He jumped back in terror as what he saw before him…

Was a penis bigger than his own!

How could he not have known this about her all this time? Why hadn’t she mentioned it beforehand?! All those years spent together and she was a hermaphrodite?!

James quickly got dressed and ran out of the apartment leaving Melissa stood there speechless. She always thought he had known, like… it was something that didn’t need to be mentioned.

The next morning arrived, Melissa woke up in James’ bed alone, he never came home.

She pulled out this mornings newspaper from the letterbox and took it into the kitchen. She opened it up and the headline read, “Man hangs self from bridge”. Reduced to tears when she realized it was James.Must have got the idea from the paper he read the other day,she thought to herself.

As she read on she learned that there was a note found pinned to his chest when he was cut down, it read: “Note To Self: Never Trust Women”.

She put the paper down; shocked.

Still, at least she had somewhere else to live now.

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9 thoughts on “Note To Self

  1. This story might put me in an asylum!!!! hahaha! Another surprise ending from Mr. Pete Howorth. And Here I was ready to turn to mush and say awww, so sweet. : ) I even thought it might have been about Danielle…. was that her name, the girl that moved away?
    Penises, Manginas, and ball sacks… good thing I’ve been around the block a few times, eh! hahaha!

    • LOL! It was going to go the way you thought it would, then I decided that might be boring so decided to throw that twist in. Yeah that was her name, well remembered! It was a cross between her and a girl I went to secondary school with who I work with now. Always best to draw from life experiences.

      Though worry not, I haven’t ever had an affair, especially with a hermaphrodite.

  2. Oh God, what a twist! I loved it. Although whenever I hear the word hermaphrodite, ‘Lola’ always floods into my head. I shall now be singing this for the rest of the evening. Curse you, Pete, and your penis-filled stories.

  3. Pingback: Love All Blogs » the altruistic blogging network and showcasing site that welcomes all bloggers » 27-02-12 Love Writers Weekly Showcase

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