Too Late

And so she stands there in tears; the droplets of water from her eyes glistening against her cheek from the moonlight above. Shaking from head to toe but not from the bitter cold of the Winter air but from fear, from absolute terror of being alone.

For nearly twenty years I have loved her. When we first met I was 12 years old, but a mere child that didn’t even know what love was. I didn’t know how to control these feelings I had for her because you cannot control what you don’t understand.

I used to watch her from afar in class and day dream what it would be like for us to be together, seeing her talking to all of the other boys, boys that were “better” than me; “prettier” than me. But I was shy, definitely far too shy to talk to her and yet she spoke to me anyway. That first time in the playground, I was sat alone on that bench; being the new kid at school wasn’t easy especially this school.

You see rough schools glorified on TV and you say to yourself that you’re glad you didn’t end up there. For most of these kids it’s not a choice, for me it was.

I had so much promise at a young age, most people aspired to work with the police or be an astronaut but not me, I had a clear path; I wanted to go to a good school, go to a good University, earn a degree in web design. I wanted to make my father proud.

But what you want isn’t always what happens, expelled for violence. Not always violence I caused but violence I was involved with none-the-less. I wasn’t there long before I was thrown out and the worst school in my town was the only one that would take me.

It felt more like a prison sentence than an opportunity. Through the tough exterior I portrayed all I had inside of me was fear, anxiety, I never found it easy to mix well with others. I made one friend quickly who protected me from the others, he had my back; a feeling I had never felt before but just like everyone else I cared about in life he left.

His parents decided it’d be a good time to move away and when he was gone I was alone, on that bench in that playground.

Then she spoke to me Continue reading

Advertisements

Eternity

You. You were everything to me. When we met, I was nothing but a low life bottom feeder. A no body, just another person in this crazy accident called life. It was because of you why I wanted to be a better person and it was because of you why I became that better person.

You never really understood how much I truly loved you, not just from a physical stand point but from a psychological stand point. We were meant to be, you were my soul mate. That first moment we kissed; for that one moment, everything was right in the world.

They say time stands still when you love someone, if that’s the case then eternity could never be long enough. I remember when I used to look at you from a far just wishing I could be apart of your life. For some reason the Gods smiled down upon me and made that happen.

You say you never told me how you truly felt about me, what I meant to you. But I don’t want you to worry because I know. I’m just sorry I failed you, I should be there for you now; but I can’t. I see someone now who has lost hope, but you will see me again. Just as I see you.

His hand grazes her lifeless body. Caressing her cheek, savouring the touch against his skin. So beautiful, almost angelic in nature.

Saying goodbye to the person you love is never an easy thing to do. Knowing that you would never see that person again… It’s beyond comprehension. Someone you woke up next to each day, someone who you cared for, who you dedicated your life for. All for heartbreak and disappointment.

The moment we were separated, the Universe thundered with the sound of two soul mates being torn apart. If only we could have foreseen this. I am asked if I knew we were to end like this, would I do it all over again.

And I would. I wouldn’t change a thing. Loving you; if only for a moment, is better than the notion of never knowing you at all. I would take the heartbreak and the suffering over the void my heart had once experienced.

I know I will see you again, I am certain of it. The next time we meet, everything will be right in the world once more. We will live in eternity; in infinite love.

Think of me when the sun bathes you in light, because I will be looking down on you. I will protect you from this moment until the day you are back in my arms.

I love you. For now and always.

He bends down and kisses her soft lips as the beeping of the heart monitor continues in the background.

Standing back up straight he can’t help but look at her. Knowing how peaceful she was at this moment, her near future only to be filled with anger and sadness the moment she wakes. This was the hardest part. Not being able to stop the one you love from suffering this pain.

There was no greater agony than a broken heart.

The sound of the rain and thunder outside of the hospital drowned out the noise of the heart monitor. He nods head and shuts his eyes as he dissipates into nothingness.

The thunder then dies down and the heart monitor takes over. And she lays there alone with only the faint sounds of I love you lingering in the air to keep her company.